own buz 23:mediation to reconcilliation, PATIENCE!

[makingmagic]

Tx for your advice Ken, I will consider what you are saying. However, I feel strongly based on others advice on here ~ that I need to see him do the action. Let him do the work. If he wants to be with me, he will make the efforts (and as small as they are .. he has been). So "I need to see the action" is an accurate statement. It is stating that the action needs to be followed by the words/thoughts. I am not sure why you disagree??

I am not trying to figure out what he is doing.... I am trying to focus on what makes me happy and how to get through the day. We are entering our busy season, along with our year end.

I am not obsessed with manipulating him into reconciliation.. that would be just plain dumb. If he does not want to come back on his own free will, I do not want him back. Hence the reason, I need to see HIM do the action. To allow myself to do the 180 and not "fix" or make it "easy". He needs to do the work!

This ^^^ is quite a challenge for me, because our old relationship operated THAT way.

To separate from him financially requires HIM to action it. Other than demanding and finding a lawyer to put in action. I am not prepared to do this at this point, when I feel he is willing to divide peacefully. I have been having conversations with him about it (asking for another mediator appt yesterday, etc). He suggests wanting to "talk" more. I will not let this slide, I will give intervals and little breaks between these convo's but will keep on top of this issue.