If he should enlist in the Navy, that doesn't necessarily mean you will be left alone. He could be on land versus on a ship and you could go and live in base housing, if it's available. Also, you and your children would be able to utilize the base facilities as well.
I know you are afraid of living alone, but it appears that you're on your own right now. As for getting the kids around town, you may be able to tag up w/some other parents that have children in gymnastics. This is where you will need to bite the bullet and ask for help from others. Don't be ashamed to do so.
The best thing you can do is try not to discuss lawyers, separation and divorce because you see where it got you this last time...he wants you to do the work. If he wants out, he can do the work. As long as you aren't rocking his boat and what he's doing, he comes across as very nice and willing to share his life's experiences w/you. When real negotiations begin to take place w/lawyers, etc., that's when he may very well begin to change into a not so nice man and the "evil twin" may appear. So, unless you want a divorce, I would not have any more discussions about it. Now, if he brings it up, you can honestly tell him that you need time to think about it and let it go.
Only communicate w/him about the children and any emergencies that arise. As for chit chat w/him, keep it short, but civil, and get off the phone or email after a few minutes. You are a busy woman and you do not need to listen to all of his chit chat. The more he sees you distancing yourself and going about your business...the more he'll contact you and show interest in what you are doing.
The best things to do are: go dim, my a little mysterious about what you are doing w/your life, no relationship talks, listen and validate, no divorce talks, and above all else, pray and dig deeper for patience.
Keep the focus on you and your children and allow the man upstairs to work on your h.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
