Wow! Thank you for the reply - you put so much into your posts! I really appreciate that. Actually I did have a sexually abusive childhood, and that is why I am seeing a sex therapist as opposed to a counsellor. When I initially contacted her, I was convinced that I was a sexless person and could live without it ever again. I chose her because I KNEW this was not normal for a 31 year old! I also KNEW that I had enjoyed sex in the past, especially with my H.
Here is my thread for a better understanding. Personally, I don't see much similarity between your W and I. Sex, for me, has always been a private, special act between lovers. I don't even like porn!
In summary, I was molested at age 7 by a friend of my father's (he was not present or aware). I witnessed my (seperated) mother in various sex acts with men she was dating and especially her second husband, my stepfather. For some reason, they felt it was appropriate to carry on sexually in front of a 9 year old child. At 16, I was dateraped AND gangbanged by the date's friends. But, that is all behind me - really.
Quote: ...you might consider at least toning down the level of involvement for a while and take the kinds of actions that show your husband you are truly sensitive to his concerns.
Yes I agree with you but I could see it if we were going out excessively, but our contact is extremely minimal currently... and is about to increase. He keeps getting upset that I don't seem to care about his feelings or understand him. It's as if we're both trying like hell to get the other to see our own point of view.
