I'm back again 4 years later

[praying_in_GA]

Yes, I am very careful to not talk about R or even hint to it.

Today I have done a 180 from yesterday. I woke up and he told me he had a coffee for me. I told him to eff off. Yep, not my proudest moment. Today we have had friendly banter as if nothing is wrong in the world.

We just finished a conversation with him, his mom, and me (his mom is here helping with the kids while I slept after work) about his thinking about joining the Navy Reserves after graduation. I told him it sounded like a interesting adventure. I turned to his mother and asked her if she would be willing to help out with the kids while he was gone.

He mentioned his brothers coming to town in May with their motorcycles. I asked if he would be able to get a temporary permit while they were down. He said he has already looked into it and will be getting one Monday. This has been a HUGE sticking point with us. I really don't want him to have a bike but I told him that was great that he would be able to ride with them. Then I joked that when he bought (when, not if!) his own we would need to double his life insurance just in case. He laughed and agreed.

He got his final grade for this mini-mester. I told him that I know I haven't said it often but that I am amazed at his ability to be such an amazing student. I told him that I know he has a lot going on between the kids and the house and to include school into that and do so very well is a huge deal.

Last time this happened his main issue was not being respected by me. In addition he felt like he was not being treated like he was important to us, not being treated as an equal, not being loved or even liked by me.

I have been smiling and happy today.

I focus on that damn ring because a couple of weeks ago he told me that when he took it off I would know he was ready to move out and to be done with this whole thing. I know I shouldn't let that weigh so heavily on me. It is like my safety net.