A twist on cake-eating & dropping a bomb of my own

[2Times2Many]

No, I am not comfortable with out CPA doing the eval and will insist on someone independent.

We signed docs today to make joint bank accounts individual accounts. I got a little bit emotional, but told him that the steps were not easy. He said that so far we hadn't done anything that couldn't be undone.

I got copies of bank statements last week on the one account I didn't have info on. Not really anything there. But I don't know where he may have stashed money ... probably overseas.

I have made copies of everything I could get my hands on.

He's been back for about a week now and is not acting at all like he has for months. He is calm and not at all angry, no matter what I say or do.

He showed up here unexpected yesterday afternoon and said dinner plans with his parents fell through. I invited him to stay for dinner and we actually had a nice evening ... talking about dumb stuff we did when we were kids and other things we haven't talked about in years.

Then he started in on how much it would cost to rent an apartment and that he needed a bed. He said he didn't want to take the one in the guest room ... that wouldn't be fair to me because I would have to replace it. He talked about how bad the hotel he is staying in is and said there wasn't another one convenient to the office here. There were a couple of other things ... like where to put his clothes until he found a place, etc. I didn't volunteer to help him out at all and just let him talk.

We talked about his sports car which I love to drive occasionally. He took it to our warehouse and parked it in an empty unit we rent. I had told him two days ago that I was going to miss being able to drive it once in a while and felt like I was being punished (I put that in a light-hearted, joking way). Yesterday, he said that it bugged him that I said I thought he was punishing me. We'll see if it bugged him enough to bring it back before he leaves at the end of the week. If not, I may bring it back myself! Probably not a good idea, huh??

Tonight he took me to dinner again and we talked a little R stuff again -- he instigated. He keeps saying he loves me but knows he can't be the husband I need. I told him that I wanted to trust him, but like Reagan said .. trust, but verify. I said I haven't been able to verify.

I also told him that I thought I had put a lot into our business, didn't take much out (not as much as he had) and had to ask myself ... where is my reward for all this work? I think he got the impression that I expected to get what I deserved and I do!

I talked a little about the other woman and asked him if he were in the same financial condition that he was when I met him, would she have become involved with him and if his world fell apart and he became dirt poor tomorrow would she still stick around. He did not answer and for the first time he did not deny that she was still in the picture.

I am beginning to feel that he is determined to go his own way but feels guilty about it. He keeps saying he will always be here to help me out if I need it.

I am so confused. One minute he seems like he regrets the direction things are going and is on the verge of saying he doesn't want this and the next he is acting like all is good with him and this direction.

I don't know if he is trying to manipulate me, play on my sympathy, trying to get back to the status quo for him (cake-eating) or what the heck is going on.

He is so different than he has been for months. I can't figure it out and I don't quite know how to deal with it.

I will proceed with the D course ... that has had some impact, but am preparing myself for the distinct possibility of having to go the distance. I am looking forward to seeing the attorney later this week. As KML says, I am sure he knows all the tricks.

Oh, he told me that he read my horoscope for 2014 a few days ago and it said I should not make any life altering decisions this year. He said his horoscope said this would be the worst year he would have in the past 10 or next 10 years. WTF????