Help!!!!

[mj0221]

I'm so sorry you are here. Try and keep on with your daily life without thinking about what and how this has happened. I've recently come up on a year anniversary of BD. I think I read where your H is a police officer? Mine is also, is able to retire this month. I know in my H's case, he has a lot of enablers, that won't say to him what a pos he is.

I just keep my space from anyone who has anything to do with the police dept. He has made everyone think I'm the devil to divert any attention off himself. Well and he told them all I made him leave. I started putting all the pieces together when I figured out more, too long to go into, but that OW is most likely another officer.

In these situations if we sit quietly all we can hope and pray is that we will get through this on top.

A point my therapist made to me the other day that made a lot of sense......
Every bit of communication from H's attorney to my attorney degrades me telling me I'm a terrible person and mother. Well naturally it always upsets me every time because I've been the sole provider since H moved out. I know deep down H knows I'm a good person and wonderful mom so why does he do this?

Therapist reminded me that H would NEVER tell me these things to my face because he knows they aren't true so he uses his attorney to hide behind. Therapist reminds me all the time to remember what I know to be true and not to even think about what he does.

I agree about them thinking they are invincible. In fact in my city they basically are. I'm entitled to half his retirement but every staffed officer of his rank who has gone to court in our city the judges always side with with the officers....and there have been some married 30 years where the wives got nothing. Yes I'm trying to avoid court. It is sad that some court systems are so unfair or I say corrupt but I'm doing my best to settle out of court.

You are early in your sitch. Keep busy. You will make it. I never thought I would make it a year.