Yeah, I mean that was then, I gave that up.

The past 2 days have been pretty good. I actually had 2 full days where I really didn't even stress about what is going on. I didn't actually think about it. I was happy, which I have not felt in a long time. I was busy and was having a good time. I looked at this at the end of the days, and was like, "well that was weird". I don't know. I just was busy both days doing things for me. Spending time with my dogs, cooking, running errands. I cant account for a lot of the time. It just kind of flew by. But it felt good! Now she has been out of the house the last 2 days, and comes home tonight. I am focusing on keeping that little momentum going.

I just haven't felt this way in a long time. It felt good. A relief off my shoulders for a bit. My focus has been on staying on the moment for me. What do I need, what do I want, How does this feel? I have a lot on my plate for me, so keeping that in place, has helped. I am trying to not think about the what ifs, instead on the what next. Now it just needs to warm up outside.


Me:36
Her:35
together 11yrs
M 7 1/2yrs
lived together 10yrs
2dogs 2cats
Mortgage on a house

bomb dropped 01/12/14
Separate bedrooms/W stays here some nights
I want to stay married