I'm in, wife's out

[trc2009]

Have had a decent couple of days. Both of us were pretty tired yesterday but I came over to watch the kids for a few hours while she went grocery shopping and left not long after.

She did say she texted her friend to see what IC her husband went to and see if it's one he would recommend. I feel keeping her in the loop with that is essential because she's kept me in the loop for the most part w/ her IC.

Again, I'm going for issues with losing my temper with her. It's only happened a few times in our time together and it never led to me hitting her or anything like that. BUT, when I lose my temper I can very much see how scary and intimidating that could be for her. I have to learn to calm myself down before I ever get to that point. Again, it's not a regular thing and lord knows each of those times I had a right to be angry or frustrated at her. But never to a point of losing my temper.

My two goals now are this.

#1 No conversations that devolve into arguments/fights.
#2 See an IC for my temper issues and keep her informed with how that is going. Obviously I'm doing it for myself but I am for her as well. I actually think this could be a deal breaker for her.

#1 is going splendidly. We're now on Day 14 of no conversations devolving into an argument. Our conversations for the most part are kind and civilized. The last two weeks have easily been the best two weeks since we separated. Again on Sunday, she said it wasn't her final decision but she's still leaning toward D. Which is a good/bad thing I think. If anything, it means she just isn't sure that we're going to slip back into the cycle we were in from 1/2/14 - 1/25/14 that led to the separation. I guess if we end the separation, there will probably have to be a leap of faith that we won't ever go back there.

#2 I'm hoping to have an appt. setup by early next week. This is a must. I should have done this a few years ago the first time I lost my temper with her.