separated on a walk II

[paul19510]

Journal: weli I got thru my first birthday and I am still alive. Lol. After wondering how it would feel and worrying about it I survived. Therd are people who value me. I have to keep that in mind. It was tempting to think sbout W and feel bad that she was quiet but I just let the feelings come and go as they needed.
W excused D13 from school today without speaking to me.they are going to a trade show for horses. D13 told me before she left for school yesterday. She asked if I knew. I said I didn't. I simply txt W and told her she must submit excuse papers for thst. I'm not doing it for her. She said she already did. More of the same behavior. I will have to bring it up with L that I would like to hwve W notify me directly about things like this. I've asked her enough.

Strange thing..W now asks D13 to leave items she wants to retrieve in the front porch if we are not home. I found items on porch when I got home yesterday. It was windy I brought them in and that's when D13 told me to l leave them outside due to request. She wanted to sleep over but now wontt enter the house???? I know..25...why bother asking why. I hear you! Just venting.
After revelations that W vented her poor opinion of me to my kids and others and frequently lied to me about things, I see very little chance of my M surviving. I am begining to see that I will likely be divorced sometime in the near future. I see a life without her.
I feel a sense of pain and self loathing for not seeing what does was happening. Others around me hwve been happy to tell me now that W is gone what happened when I was not looking...they say love is blind. This may be true.

Onward into this new day. Have a great day all