Always so nice to come and visit and have a message waiting for me!
After Eric's post, I felt better. Just that nudge and a change of perspective was what I needed. Accept that this is life right now and he is not in it and that I need to focus on the people and things that are in my life and focus on me.
There is a lot of work to do on me, so really, that should take up quite a bit of time!
Nero, I get your feelings about being touched or even talking to Skippy. Sometimes I think I miss the Skippy in my head more than I miss who he is now. Any familiarity that we once shared is long gone.
He eventually responded to my text, about a day and half after I sent it. It was friendly, nothing special, nothing personal. But by that time, I pondered Eric's post and reshifted a bit and I found that by the time the response came, it really was a day late and a dollar short.
Maybe you are starting to feel that way, too? That your H has become a stranger. I imagine that feels even stranger up close. Haven't seen Skippy in a long time but I almost can no longer imaging seeing him. Too much baggage.
Depression is an insidious thing. It burrows into your brain and it won't let go. I am trying different things but it truly is amazing when I can't even seem to get out of bed in the morning and it takes a heculean effort to shove myself out of bed. Sometimes I make it, sometimes I don't. I make it more than I don't, so I will take that as progress.
