Actually MrBond, I am not fear basing. I am actually standing up for myself and being strong. Holding true to self value. I am finally strong enough in my belief in me... this is why I am at the point I am.
You are right.. I am hearing what I dont like, and I am responding by not allowing myself to be involved in R talks while he is entertaining another relationship. The only person I am controlling is me, from being roped into a triangle.
If it closes the door, I need to know that now. I am ready.. However, if the door closes so easily.. I am ready to know that he is not ready/willing to fight.
It is HIS relationship too. He admits and cherishes it ALOT and has vocalized it alot recently too. If it is so strong for him, let him prove it.
It is his words to state that: he cherises the rare intimacy that is so apparant in our relationship.
He says we are both exhausted of the situation. Although, he wants to keep the communication lines open. I am tired of "hearing" the same stuff.. Wasn't it Advina to suggest that I tell him not to bother with "talk" anymore.
I was greatful that he feels safe enough to open up to me... but the conversations leave us both in circles. And emotionally, I am drained. If he wasn't entertaining the OW, I would be more inclined to be patient and listen.
M:46 H:49 T:20yrs myD:22 H distant summer/12 H sleeping in b'ment: Nov/12 BD: Dec 2/12 asked me begin to move end of Jan/13 moved Jan 7/13 (left my stuff) "agreed" to "working on r" Mar 3/13(lipservice!)
