So today I had another IC appointment. She basically said that I need boundaries, and to take care of myself first. She said when you love someone it's easy to put them first, but H is now taking advantage and treating me like a doormat. She quoted a proverb I really liked: 'Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life'
She is right and I know it, I'm just not sure how to set some boundaries, as both my H and I do shift work, on changing rosters. So saying something like 'you can have them every second fri through sun' won't work as neither of us have regular days off. We struggled organising our rosters when we lived together!
I registered for single parent payment today too, I have an interview next week. I feel sort of sad about it, but I need to make sure the kids are ok. And if I can get iti may be able to work less, so I can be here for the kids more.
My IC also said this is his issue, not mine, he has stuff from his childhood especially, he hasn't dealt with properly and it's manifested this way. He isn't ready or able to turn inwards and face himself. And all I can do is look after me, and the kids and hope something changes in him, so he will deal with it, otherwise there is virtually no hope. Although she did say that he will most likely sabotage every relationship that follows me too.
