Won't stop affair. Wants divorce now.

[25yearsmlc]

I'm not going full custody out of hatred or anything close to that. I want the best for my daughter. Leaving her with another family multiple times a week is not acceptable.

Wait a second. Since when is it not acceptable. Since OM? You are pretending this is about what is best for your d but it was all fine when you believed your w was keeping her vows.

This is you, not seeing when you are being petty or punitive. You need to recognize the difference between a health boundary & your wounded pride. We ALL had to do this, btw.

I don't know this people. She drop her at day care and the woman pick her up from there. What good mother leave her daughter overnight till 2pm next day.


What kind of mother? Gee, how about a single working mom who only sees her h a few days a month I guess...YOUR chronic long term absence helped create this situation.

I don't mean to slap you around too hard when you are down, but you need to see your role in this FAST or you will learn nothing. Then, instead of becoming a bEtter you, you will become a bItter you.

I'll think her daughter will be more important than any other man. What woman have sex with another man while her daughter is watching a movie on her iPad in a one bedroom apt. Why confused a child by bringing another man around her this early. She get confused when she sees me. She pretty much have to reminds her that's daddy every time am over there to see her. I'm confused and sad.

Lost, you know why your d is confused and it's NOT b/c of your w. It's b/c you are gone too much for too long, and you have a very young d with a short memory and short attention span. Hence the need for frequent in person contact, which YOU must create.

My h is an MD who has worked long hours, that are unrelenting, for decades. Not one of our 3 children wants to be a doctor for that very reason.

Our oldest d used to hide from h when he'd get home after working 80-90 hours a week b/c she did not know him...that is NOT my fault or my d's.

It's a byproduct of & trade off many doctors and their families make. But it stinks. And if I had it all to do over again, I would not want my h to go back to school for his MD. But I don't have it to do over again.

So I hope others learn from this^^^....you don't get to make up for lost time.

You only get to go "from this day forward" like the vows tell us.

Let go of all thoughts about your w for now. She is taking up too much space in your head.

AND tell us what you are learning from the Div Busting/Remedy books...you are reading it, right?