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[BklynMom]

The PSH story has been unbearable for me to follow. For me too, reminds me so much of our pain.

In a funk today. I am so sad. I think its just really hard when the girls are not around. I am them and they are me. Maybe its not healthy but they are my life. They are my everything and I just feel like something is missing when they are gone.

I also try to deny/suppress that I still dream & pray that the monster comes home.

I want my family to be whole. I try try try to count my blessings, to remember those less fortunate but I would do anything for my kids and everytime they leave our home its so hard for them. All my girls want is mommy and daddy to be together.

I feel like I am wasting my time waiting for a day that may never come. Either he comes home or atleast acknowledges his mistake. Why am I still waiting??

The pain is so deep and hurtful. I am able to function and survive unlike in the beginning where I was just holding on for dear life but the pain is still so real