Barrybran III - New job, new life?

[Barrybran]

Where does everyone stand regarding courtesy with their spouses? Tonight, my wife invited a co-worker, a young girl who has had some problems that my wife has been like a big sister to, around for dinner. I don't have a problem with this. It's dinner, she's a nice girl and my wife is entitled to live her life as she pleases. I do have an issue with the fact that this girl has just followed my wife home and my wife hadn't mentioned anything to me about it. Again, I don't have an issue with my wife inviting someone around for dinner but I feel as though courtesy should still apply as it's my house as well as my wife's.

I had another minor incident I wasn't sure how to address. After work today I popped into my wife's workplace to ask if she needed anything from the shops. She said we didn't as she had done the shopping the previous day. She has been on me lately for grabbing groceries daily rather than weekly however we've not run out of many items since I've been home and done a daily shop. I went home, found some items we actually needed and waited for my wife to come home.

When she arrived home I asked again if she needed anything and told her I was going to the shop. She said she didn't and I clarified again. I went to the shop, returned home and my wife said she needed some tomato paste as the stuff she had bought the day before was out of date and she hadn't checked it. This is where I got confused. I could have just said nothing and done it. I could have expressed my feelings about her lack of attention to detail and organisation as she has told me to express my feelings recently. Not knowing how to handle it I went for the middle ground, told her I had asked if she needed anything (maybe with a slight "you f-ed up" look on my face) and left for the shop again.

As I said, this was minor but I feel that it was quite an important interaction as I could have made things better or worse with a simple task. Does anyone have an opinion on how I could handle situations like these in the future?