melissa - standing up for me

[25yearsmlc]

I did not respond and got this text:

"I'll take that as a no. Just as a heads up, I'm planning on discussing with them this weekend. "

WTF? Um. No. That's a convo we all have together.


THIS^^ is what you tell him, i.e. " a convo we all have together..., "as per the child T" I have spoken with (hope this is true soon)

Oh & btw, H, that^^ is ONE reason I did not tell them. Plus, what's to tell?
Besides, the SEP I filed for was merely a legal reflection of their reality. The DIVORCE is what I presume You are handling. ??

Will you be telling them about that, too? Just so I know."

Melissa, consider those ^^ And look below to see if you like the following, but get input!

"I think it's important we not pretend their lives will be all the same or that this is not going to be hard on them. Of course I won't stress that, but To the extent I can, I will keep as many factors in their lives, the same as possible."

and maybe even this...

"I feel "we" have to acknowledge our sense of failure for the kids, or at least our regret b/c this is turning their lives upside down. And as much as we tell ourselves "kids are resilient, adults are on a journey of self discovery..."

I think we both know that's^^ just plain backwards. WE are resilient adults, and KIDS are on their journeys of self discovery..."


Any ideas of what to say without going into "don't F with my kids or I will kill you" mode?

See above^^ and learn to "radiate from within" things like "Don't f with my kids or..." b/c it is effective yet difficult to be attacked for b/c it's all non verbal...

I think your h is trying ME patience...hang in there Melissa!


We are all pulling for you!