Thank you for replying 2nd. My great consideration for him wasn't really an issue in our marriage, just something I feel he takes for granted. I feel like I'm getting walked on because I'm considerate with him, yet I get no consideration in return. His biggest issues with me are my controlling tendencies and my jealousy. I can admit that sometimes I overdid it with my controlling habits, but other times I felt completely justified. My H's only real responsibility was his job. I pretty much took the reigns when we got married. I handle all our finances, I manage the home, take care of the kids, there really isn't much that is left for him to do. He has always struggled with that, but for the most part I THOUGHT he understood that I'm not trying to be controlling on purpose it is just the nature of the beast. I have to think of everything and manage our life if we want to live the life we want to. My husband is horrible with finances and so I took over and began saving and budgeting. Since he makes the money he has never been too happy about it, but I guess he tolerated it because we remained financially secure. He would tell me that I don't let him do anything and that he should be able to spend however he pleased and that I'm just trying to control his life. Since we have split we have divided our savings and I have been able to maintain it. From my snooping(I know...bad) I have found out that he has spent all of it! In a matter of 4 weeks he has spent thousands! I no longer manage him(definite 180), I leave him to his own devices, but it really worries me that he is in that situation. I wonder to myself if it ever crosses his mind that I was strict with our finances for our own benefit. I've also tried suppressing the jealousy. It's been almost two weeks since I've brought up the other girl. Through all of that though, it doesn't seem to inspire any positive reactions from him. He is cold as ice. Emotionally I'm getting better, I cry less and less everyday. Certain things trigger me, but for the most part if I'm keeping busy with one thing or another...I'm okay. I don't know if what I'm starting to feeling is acceptance, resignation, or what. I don't want to lose hope, but I don't know if holding onto someone that doesn't care too much is good also.
