I'm in, wife's out

[trc2009]

It really is amazing how GAL helps. Even before she dropped the bomb on me, I was starting to lifting weights again for the first time in years. Honestly, I'm getting back into "college-shape" and it's amazing how much of a confidence builder that is. I went out with friends on Saturday and that did wonders for me. I've kind of dove back into work after being mentally checked out for the last month or so. And as always, I focus on the my kids. If the weather was better, I'd be golfing more, doing yardwork, etc (can't wait for spring).

For those stumbling across this board, that was one thing these guys advised and it is the God's honest truth.

G.A.L.! You'll be amazed at what it can do for you.

Now. Here's a question for the veterans out there. I've done the 180. Other than the hiccup on Friday (but I ended up getting into the house more so it was probably a necessary evil), I think I've really done a good job at sticking to it.

When we first separated, she indicated how happy she was and indicated it's the happiest she's been in years. Obviously that isn't 100% true. I can see through that crap. She may be happy that I'm not there at times because of the tension between us, but she isn't the "happiest she's been in years." From what I've read so far, that's typical of a W.A.S.

I know there is no timeline and patience is key, but do you typically see signs of an impact of the 180 within the first few weeks? She does throw out tons of mixed signals but it does seem like the things she brings up with me are much less pissy and negative. There's still tension without a doubt but she's not throwing out the little barbs of condescension like she was during the first couple weeks of the separation. But she is also INCREDIBLY difficult to read. She's always been very guarded with her thoughts/emotions. That's why I'm laying back and letting her come to me. It's almost like the ultimate staring contest.

That being said, my goal of "no discussions devolving into an argument" is on Day 5. I keep telling myself "BE AN ACTIVE LISTENER IDIOT!" That is one flaw in this marriage I will take full ownership of.