Paul, are you doing IC or Alanon, support group...anything??? Besides DB coaching- something for YOU outside of the M?
Your thinking and emotions seem all over the place. Last week you went from thinking you were dropping the rope to realizing you are still too attached to getting attracted to someone else. Some in-person outside help would benefit you, I think. This board is great, but having someone in the same room with you with whom you can have a verbal exchange is fantastic.
FWIW, I have been told the cycling of emotions is normal. Don't push it away, sit with it and process it.
Just my .02
Hang in there...
Me: 39 H: 45 Second marriage for both H left 12/2013 M:4 T:5.5