Divorcebusting.com  |  Contact      
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 6 of 11 1 2 4 5 6 7 8 10 11
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 9,676
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 9,676
"to fake carenof stuff for thr kids "

I used to translate for Rick1963, I can't translate this. ???


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 140
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 140
"To take of stuff for the kids" . I got this but thought "sigging" was smoking by the pool. Lol.

Good job asking your wife for help Paul, i thought that was a great way to get the help you need and have her step up to take care of the kids.


M45 H46
M16 yrs
D17, D10, D7
DB 1-23-2014
H filed D 2-14-2014
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 9,676
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 9,676
Why is this the first time you've asked her to be a parent? (it's not helping out) I think we talked about this before, making sure she had equal time with the kids.

What say you, Paul?


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 883
P
Member
OP Offline
Member
P
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 883
Bug, in my kind helping out or attending games is not even a queation. W seems to need my requests for this to get in gear. I am not good st asking for help and this is a 180 for me I realized this today.


me: 47, W:49
M 16.5 years
T 17 years
Three kids - D17,D14, S13
Heart 2 heart about M 11/8/13
Bomb drop 11/29/13
W moved out 12/5/13
I Retained L 2/20/14
D filed 3/17/14
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 883
P
Member
OP Offline
Member
P
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 883
Journal: I met someone that I started to like. Nothing happened but I did start to like this person and she liked me too. Although I told myself that its way too early to like someone, this person was respectful of my situation and in the time since we met she found someone else who is not quite so "tangled up" and is really more available. I hurt myself a little by hoping maybe something could be possible once I resolved things more clearly here. It was just nice to be appreciated and flirted with. Harmless...but it gave me a little hope for the future. Still hurt a little bit. Life goes on. Surely there will be othe opportunities if my life takes me in that direction.


me: 47, W:49
M 16.5 years
T 17 years
Three kids - D17,D14, S13
Heart 2 heart about M 11/8/13
Bomb drop 11/29/13
W moved out 12/5/13
I Retained L 2/20/14
D filed 3/17/14
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 12,602
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 12,602
Do you still want to save your M? If so, I would avoid seeing this person again. Like all relationships, it starts out well but goes south once REALITY sets in.

But if you want to move on, then sign the papers and go for it.


M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 883
P
Member
OP Offline
Member
P
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 883
I am not going to see this person. I was suprised how things felt from making a new friend and whst occured so I wanted to write it down.


me: 47, W:49
M 16.5 years
T 17 years
Three kids - D17,D14, S13
Heart 2 heart about M 11/8/13
Bomb drop 11/29/13
W moved out 12/5/13
I Retained L 2/20/14
D filed 3/17/14
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 883
P
Member
OP Offline
Member
P
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 883
Journal: work is getting busy. I am slipping behind a little. I have to pick up the pace. I am having trouble coconcentrating again. The bills are sitting in tbe sorter and I need fo go thru fhem. I should have gone over to fhe part time job tbis morning at 5 this morning but I was up talking with s12 at 3 am and never got to sleep again. He had a nightmare and needed to talk it thru.

I am exhausted and frustrated. I will get up and go to the gym. That should help. I feel like I am sinking a little bit today. Does anybody else have these days? Nothing feels right today. I feel alone. Sorry to sound dark. I'm sure this will pass, but its not nice. I feel stuck. The only way thru it is thru it.


me: 47, W:49
M 16.5 years
T 17 years
Three kids - D17,D14, S13
Heart 2 heart about M 11/8/13
Bomb drop 11/29/13
W moved out 12/5/13
I Retained L 2/20/14
D filed 3/17/14
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 456
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 456
Paul, are you doing IC or Alanon, support group...anything??? Besides DB coaching- something for YOU outside of the M?

Your thinking and emotions seem all over the place. Last week you went from thinking you were dropping the rope to realizing you are still too attached to getting attracted to someone else. Some in-person outside help would benefit you, I think. This board is great, but having someone in the same room with you with whom you can have a verbal exchange is fantastic.

FWIW, I have been told the cycling of emotions is normal. Don't push it away, sit with it and process it.

Just my .02

Hang in there...


Me: 39
H: 45
Second marriage for both
H left 12/2013
M:4 T:5.5
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 9,676
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 9,676
Yes cycling of emotions is normal in this.

We talk a lot about our expectations of the WAS around being responsible for their "issues", it's now our job to fix them, if they had only...

We are responsible for our issues, it is our job to fix us. You sound a bit like you're circling, not cycling. What does Paul need to do to help Paul?

Artsy had some good suggestions.


Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss
Page 6 of 11 1 2 4 5 6 7 8 10 11

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Michele Weiner-Davis Training Corp. 1996-2025. All rights reserved.
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5