Floatin down the mighty rivers of British Columbia

[LoisB]

Ok. I mean there's a part of me that is still a lil scared he will go do something wicked to retaliate, which is his M.O. Like a cornered wild animal, he will lash out. But, the best he could do this morning was a feeble, "Oh, so-and-so called about this bill." And, it was D11-related so it was really lame.

I feel good. I feel strong. I feel that he has continued to prove to the world his insanity--without my even having to argue or speak out against it. He simply hangs himself when left to his own devices. And, I'm glad that I called him on this money crap. I thought it was interesting how quickly he got back to me. I hope he was scared. For someone who lies as he does, the truth is like Kryptonite.

And, I faced the "friend" this morning. I was my normal cheerful self. And, she didn't seem upset at all. In fact, I made some suggestions to her about getting organized she complained about her her husband's lack of help and lack of accountability.

I'm going to be ok.

So tired though. Still so tired. I think it's the weather. We were blasted with another snow storm last night.

[LoisB]

That's exactly how he phrased it, "Oh, and so-and-so called me about this bill."

It was so very middle school and nearly replied, "Well, your mother wears combat boots." But I didn't.

It was his old tactic. Heather confronts Smokey and Smokey shoots back with some bill or debt or something that Heather overlooked or screwed up. Only this time, with all the he's pulled, it was so blatently obvious and juvenile and stupid...Like a little boy getting caught with his hand in the cookie jar and, then, blaming his brother. "I was only getting it for brother."

It didn't work even a little. And, the rise it got outta me was minimal. I saw it as weak and sick, more than threatening. What a sad, weak little man.

[LoisB]

Come to think of it, he's probably the one feeling scared. I wonder how much of his fear, I take on? He likes to spread it around and I'm usually there to suck it up like a sponge. I'm not sure I need to feel scared. I haven't done anything except take care of our kids while he continues to act irresponsibly.

[job]

I'm not surprised that your client "friends" sent an angry response. They expected you to continue teaching their children for little of nothing and continue to pick the child up. They really had it easy and you were the one losing out on this deal.

Sounds like you are getting your ducks in a row this morning and rounding up what is due you. Good for you. Set those boundaries and adhere to them.

[BrightFuture]

Heather, good job handling the text exchange with Smokey and the conversation with your client “friends”. I wonder sometimes too, why I am the one who is scared. He should be scared of making the choices that I’m sure he still questions.

[Ab Fab]

Heather I am really encouraged by you. You have come so far since I started following your story. What a difference in your attitude to all of this.

I wish I could have your confidence in even thinking about a new relationship. I know you have only been testing the waters, yet I just cant see myself with another man, not even the old one at the moment. Yet I can see how good it can make you feel, just to have someone take an interest. I guess these things come in time.

I can understand why some people have warned you about the consequences of dating sites, but you would never want to do to others what smokey has done to you. yet I am sure there must be some path that will allow you to make new male friends, and enjoy a little light flirtation. Maybe then you will finally understand whether you still want to fight for what you had, or walk away completely... another answer to sit and wait for.

I appreciate you stopping by my thread. I don't post as often as I should on others threads, I don't feel I can add much at the moment, but knowing there is someone out there who understands what it is I am feeling makes a big difference on a bad day. Thank you for that.

[Whiterose]

Heather, I've read through, and you're sounding much stronger and in a better place...I'm so happy for you with all these changes. It's a slow process, we move like a turtle stuck at the bottom of a river of molasses, BUT we move

Truth be told I'm on dating site too....I've met one man twice (just a drink and then a movie) but I've let that slide. I'm very honest and am very casual....it's more to talk with a man that doesn't hate me than to start a relationship. It's given my PMA a boost and although I'm not as "active" on it as I was at the beginning (as I'm still struggling with it all) it has served it's purpose and I've had some very nice talks with some men and it's allowed me to get my baby toe wet (for now) in the dating pool.

I'm not posting as much as I should but I am reading through so I wanted to say "hi"

[LoisB]

Business sitch.

Oh, and thanks guys for all the great feedback!! It made me smile. :-) <<<See< That's my smile.

I billed the "friends" back at the beginning of the month. They didn't pay. So, I was loose on hours. I cancelled when they didn't show. I cancelled a few times just because I was tired of getting taken advantage of, I didn't put much into this for the month of February with their one son. But, I did drive back and forth for the other sibling and teach D11's bestie (the sister)and I think I did well there.

So, I made my decision earlier this week. That's it. I'm done and I told them so.

So, today I get a check for $150. This is AFTER I told them I would only teach the daughter on a very part-time basis for $75 per month. This is mainly to help this girl get outta the house and make sure she is doing her schoolwork.

So! WTF. Now, I feel like I'm taking money without fully doing the work. Which is crap actually because I have driven back and forth and put up with their lateness and given the girl student two workbooks and set up a schedule for her which she can use when she isn't here.

Thoughts?

[LoisB]

It's the 20th of February!

[LoisB]

Received a text at 9 a.m.

Smokey: The morg will be paid Monday along with a two hundred dollar deposit into checking. I get paid again on Friday and will have the remaining six hundred of D11's support for Feb. then.