Hi, I'm new to this forum and I believe that I need all the help I can get. My wife recently started becoming very distant, and over Christmas went by herself to visit her brother in a different country than where I live. I took this as betrayal to our home and child, because she left on the 26th of December and came back on the 3rd of January, leaving me and our child alone to spend the New Year's. What I hadn't realized was that she was trying to distance herself from me, and think about how to ask me for a divorce. After she came back I confronted her, and she said that she wanted to leave and take the child with her. I asked her, pleaded her, to give us a second chance, but after a couple of weeks she decided that she did not want to have any physical relationship with me, and in fact she wanted to stay by herself and with our child. I thought that I should leave the house, but after I regained my composure, I told her that since she wanted to break the marriage, she should be the one to move out, and without the child. She finally said no, and she decided that she needed time by herself, to think things through. She said that she would take the time in our house, but with us having no contact whatsoever.
We have been married for 10 years, and had been dating for 10 more, living together for the past 15 years. And this is where we are now, one week into this period of "living together but separately". She sleeps with the child, and I sleep in our bedroom by myself.
After reading a lot on here, I realized that pleading, begging, and telling her I love her is not going to help much. But I am in extreme psychological pain. I cannot think about anything else other than this situation and how we arrived here. I need to know that it is possible to win her back, because I love her dearly and do not want to see my family become a broken home. I am willing to set things straight and do whatever it takes to win her back.
She is now closed to the world, though. She says that one too many times she has made decisions based on what other people told her, and she now wants to take the time to make up her own mind by herself. And while I understand that, I am so scared that she will come back and say that she finally decided to get a divorce. As I said, she is my whole world, and I was entirely and completely unaware that I was causing her so much pain. She says she was screaming to me, begging me to take action, but I was so unaware and in my own little world, that I never heard any of it... Until now, where I think it may be too late.
I need help. What can I do?
I will update this once my thread has been approved. _____________________ M 38 W 38 D 7 M 10
