Barrybran III - New job, new life?

[Barrybran]

Well tonight has been eventful. This afternoon, my wife and I enjoyed each others company playing Wii. There were plenty of laughs and encouragement and it was nice to see my wife smiling. I touched her briefly a few times through the day as a heat check which I know wasn't a great idea. After the kids went to bed I sat on the couch with her and started rubbing her back and she asked me to stop. She had been asking the kids all afternoon to rub her back and none of them would so I thought she'd let me.

A short while later I could hear my three year old opening and closing the door. I went to check on her to find that she had wiped poo all over her door, walls, carpet, toys and bedding. It's the worst thing any of my kids have ever done. I called my wife in and in no time she was in tears. We cleaned the room up and I tried my best to validate my wife's feelings but I felt helpless. As much as I've understood the need to be patient and that she had rejected me rubbing her back only minutes earlier, I found myself wanting to console her more than ever. I know that's up to her so I just tried my hardest to listen when she spoke and keep clear of her when she didn't, helping to clean up instead.

Once we cleaned the room and got the kids back into bed I was somewhat lost. I felt kind of useless and hurt which I know isn't good but I was in the moment somewhat. I wanted to be alone but settled for returning to the living room my wife was in. Once she had settled down she turned the Wii back on and it was all teamwork, smiles and laughter again.

Man, it's confusing lately. Hanging out and laughing, to "don't touch me", to distraught, back to hanging out and laughing all in an hour. I didn't have an opportunity to read any DR over the weekend which I was looking forward to doing. Instead I spent the day rounding up kids and cleaning. With seven straight days of work starting tomorrow I know I had to do something for myself today but we had washing piled up so it had to be done. At least I caught up and I feel good about that heading into the week.