Four weeks in, hopeful but just starting!

[labug]

When/if he brings up this above list and further details about D, what are some ways to respond? What I WANT to say is something like "I really do have hope that we could work through this and have an even better marriage than before, so this is not what I want. I understand my part in this and have been working on myself to be less controlling, less clingy, and more independent. But I also understand that it takes two people to do that, so if you haveno interest in that, I will have to accept that"

have you thought more about this? Puts pressure an blame on him, usually doesn't work in any setting.

I guess I feel like if he moves forward with D, that I need to share more of my feelings/show that I do still care about our M (since I haven't said anything in weeks about that) as a last ditch effort.

If he wants a D why woul you caring about your M change his mind? I know that's painful but it's where he is right now.

I kind of worry that DBing is pushing him farther away because it comes across as not caring about him. He's much warmer to me when we're in the same room, watching TV together, doing small talk, etc. like last night, but then when I go and do something like tonight it pushes him towards D again. What to do??

Many people think DB pushes the S away. You have no way of knowing what his feelings are ("much warmer") unless he tells you.

The list means nothing until he makes it mean something. Nothing has changed except you have another piece of information.

I hope you have something fun or interesting planned for today.

((( )))
That's taking 2 data points and coming up with a conclusion.