The reason she gave why she doesn't want to give me full access is because she felt violated how I eventually found out about the affair. I had hacked her laptop, copied the backup of her iPhone, purchased an extractor program, and eventually guessed her encryption password. I found out not only what happened, but virtually all of the gory details up until that point. She doesn't know it, but I also go all the photos she'd sent but had deleted from her phone. She doesn't want me going through her life looking for more dirt.
To be fair, that's EXACTLY what I would do, at least after initially gaining access. It feels like the longer she waits to give me access (assuming she ever does), the longer it will take to restore my trust in her. Obviously I'll never be able to trust her blindly again, but I'm hoping the potential scenarios of what she 'could be' doing won't be scrolling through my head when she wants to go out shopping.
In the meantime she's been making the effort to let me know where she's going, checking in with me during the day when she's not at home, and getting back at a decent time. It doesn't help to stop the scenarios from running through my head, but its enough (for now, at least) to keep me in the marriage.
