Hello, W-dropped the bomb on me that she is done with the M and she has no desire to fix it. She has been to two counseling sessions and it seems she gets more distant after these sessions.
We have been married for 3 1/2 years and together for 6yrs. She has a son 14 and I have a daughter 11. this is my second marriage. We have a house together.
W told me today 2/13/14 she has filed for D, My heart sank!, I held my composer, she did bring up the relationship and how it has given her great pain to come to this. I did tell her that I know it wasnt easy coming to this conclusion. I did give her a request, asking for more time, she said no. I have begun making changes to myself all ready. I don't suspect an affair, however she seen that I have familywhere (tracking system)on our cell phones and that really made her angry, she told me it was crazy to track her, it tracks mine, hers and my D. That seem to cause her to file. I say this because up until this point she kissed me and said I love you everday before she left for work. The last time she did was Tues 2/11/14. She even stopped calling me.
W has told me one of the biggest issues is how her son and I have a strained relationship. I met her when he was 8yrs old and he was running the house. What I mean is he was still sleaping in her bed, watching t.v till late hours even on school nights etc... I told W that he should be in his own bed at that age. Make a long story short we broke him of some of these habits and I believe this caused a strain on our relationship. I eventually backed off after we went to counseling about it after we got married near the first year of marriage.
W told me there is nothing that I can do to change this. She has told me her complaints in the past, like drinking to much, not spending time with her, not spending family time and not helping around the house. The sad part is I had this book DB before from my first marriage and my wife then had several affairs and I never went back to reading the DB principals. I fell in a rut.
I'm a Police Officer and I see a very negative world, I see the worst of worst in people and what they do to one another and I allowed myself to escape it by drinking and then not having any energy for my W and Kids.
I feel like such a failure, I must maintain control and order on the streets and I cant even keep a family together.
W told me she should of left 2 yrs ago and I knew about DB and I did nothing. I did admit my wrong doings to her and apologized for failing our M and family. She cried and told me this isnt easy, I tod her I know. She then went to bed. So this is where I'm at. I have to get some goals together and my main one is no drinking no matter how bad I feel.
