Maybe Piecing ... But Now I am The Unhappy One

[lost_hope]

Hi Mimi, I was trying the "do not initiate" part of DB-ing/180. I have spent far too many nights complaining of lack of affection than a young, healthy, married woman should have to. I just want to say I AM happy. I have always been happy in life, no more than now with my gorgeous son in my life, but I am unhappy in my marriage. I agree I shouldn't depend on him for happiness in life, but isn't it right to depend on my husband to fulfil me in my marriage? If not, then like I said we are friends who amicably co-parent our child, share finances and have very occasional sex. Also I can try to dress up a bit at night, but honestly he never appreciates it when I do. He never compliments me, ever. So I have given up doing things at home. I still get dressed up for me and for work, but it all comes off when I am home b/c I now really don't have the time to prance around for him when I am a b-feeding mom who needs to be in comfy clothes. I lieterally don't have the mental capacity right now .

Accuray, that's a hard question. I see your general point but honestly, if I had ten years to live, I think I would stay in my current sitch for my son, stop the war/DB-ing and live out the rest of my years peacefully. BUT I 100% agree with you, you are correct, we are not piecing at all. H won't go to counselling. I've tried. Even after his EA, to get me back he agreed to it, and then he stopped after 1 sesssion b/c he said we can fix out own problems. Clearly that was not the case

2stubborn2quit, I did read DB while pregant but maybe it's time I dust it off again. I agree with you and Accuray I need to GAL like my life depends on it. I never reached the point where I feel independent, no. Because part of me feels that is so unauthentic in a marriage. Like if I have to be that way, then why be married? Oh yeah ... in our case amicably co-parenting a baby, sharing finances and occastional sex. Sigh ...

Thanks for the feedback guys.