Friendship A confidant Someone who isn't judging her
I've been thinking on these things because in order to move forward, I need to be able to try to meet all of my W's needs again.
So on the way to lunch, I made the simple comment to her that I was glad she was able to see her IC yesterday. I told her that I know she doesn't have a lot of outlets or listening ears in her life at the moment. She readily agreed and it's been difficult for her. I told her that outside of being her W, that I wanted to be here to listen for her. To try to help her sort out her stuff if she needed me and that I would do my best but I would let her know if it was too much at any given time and we would pause. She said thanks.
Ok. fair enough. She knows I am willing to try.
And then....
After shopping and laughing, we were at lunch and the conversation steered into her IC and her therapist, how much she liked her (it's the 4th one she's tried) and this is a good fit, yada, yada, yada, and then W started to opened up with a story about xAP.
In my head, 82 DB'ing 2x4's hit me at once with a resounding "STFU! and listen!"
So I did...
W: Ya know how xAP has always been a little "different" seeking out odd things?
M: ah-hah, I remember
W: Well, do you know what Amago? AmIgo? something like, that therapy is?
M: I don't
W: Well, she made me go to that a few times.
M: What was is like?
W:I have no idea! (laughing)
M:(laughing) Way to be present!
W: I know right?!? (both laughing)
And then we kept talking and I smoothly transitioned the conversation into one about the psychology class I am taking.
Note: Of course now I know she meant Imago Therapy, and I am finding it weirdly and pleasantly amusing that within the 3 months they lived together the xAP became the nagging, fill-in wife that got to see my W uninterested and deflective on a therapists couch. I hope my W threw in the old tried and true "I don't know." At every question asked. LOL!!!
But come on xAP... Imago Therapy for an affair relationship with a married woman? ROFL!!! What were you thinking? Oh! That your relationship was legit. Nice try.
W just emailed me a funny joke between us. All in all, Good interactions today. Laying off tonight. Gonna let it be.
Me(F):40 WAW:44 T:13yrs M:9yrs BD:2/12 (I saw a text) ILYBINILWY: 5/12 PA admission: 12/12 (began 3/11) S:2/13 Moves in w/AP D begins: 7/13 W moves home to R: 10/13
What were you thinking? Oh! That your relationship was legit. Nice try.
All in all, Good interactions today. Laying off tonight. Gonna let it be.
