own buz 22:mediation to reconcilliation, hopefully

[makingmagic]

last posting:
good morning... spent some time "thinking"... I really don't believe I appear "desperate" to him. Although I am personally anxious. I don't think he can "see" it. To him, I appear busy, and on the go... no time!

He may "know" that I am waiting... but I am not acting like a desperate woman.

I may be asking for advice on what to do about the position I am in, BUT I can mention the Things I am NOT doing:

I am not clingy (begging, pleading)
I am not calling him (unless business)
I am not texting (unless business, with the exception of my "good night" reply)
I am not jumping at every "coffee" he offers
I am not crying
I am not hanging off of him
I am not pursuing him in ANY way shape or form.
I am not giving myself away or making it easy for him...
I am not ...

I value myself. I may be in a position where the ball is in his court, but I am not manipulating or controlling him to make a decision that he may not want. I want him to decide based on HIS desire, not mine. As Sandi pointed out... He WILL take advantage, because he already has... What can/should be done about this?

I am however disappointed that after 20 years...the signs are not clear and obvious to him.