Great advice above...Very solid!! I am going to CURRENTLY disagree with MR B....Currently being the big term. I don't think you are in the place to talk with the wife yet.....I just don't see you being able to control the pain in your gut YET. Give it some time, you will get there, but right know I think you will get sucked into R talks, etc way to easy and fast. You have time...she has given that to you. Use it...It is a gift.
The Email....There really aren't any surprises in it are there Lost!? We have all kind of pointed those things out about your marriage. Good stuff actually...Now we start on getting you to a place where she wants to become emotionally invested in you. Not talking about begging, pleading, whinning, or guilt tripping her there.....You become the man only a fool would leave and then MAYBE...just MAYBE....she becomes emotionally reinvested. Yes, we do things that seem totally unconventional and back words, but the WORK.
Forget about the affair....it is a symptom, not the cause. You are a doctor....so the difference should be pretty clear to you.
Deal with your part of the cause....and usually the symptom goes away.
