I am not fully up to speed on your sitch. It looks like you are divorced but your XH came back. Now you are looking for more in the R.
FWIW, I agree with what everyone has posted to you. You matter. You have needs. You should not be afraid to speak you mind.
That said, as I think about it....maybe there is a happy medium. Maybe instead of sitting down and having a long talk...you can do this slowly and over time. For example: if one of the things you want is more intamacy (this is just an example - I am not sure if this is the case)....then find the right time to request that and only that. Then....wait for the opportunity to ask for your next need. So...instead of asking for everything at once, you are doing it over time.
Finally - YOU should not be afriad to lose him or anyone for that matter. I understand how you may want to avoid the pain. You do not control him though. He will ultimately do what he needs to do and you must do the same for you.
Good luck Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
