I'm glad you are seeking treatment for your depression. If you didn't have it already, BD probably would have caused it. It's up to your Dr., but ADs might help your mood improve and help give you the motivation that you need. Ironically, you inaction brought about the very things that you feared. Learning to become a man of action from now on should be your primary goal.
Your wife is living without hope that your M can work right now. No amount of you trying to verbally convince her that you are changing will help. You must show through your ACTIONS that you are committed to change. I'm going to generalize here (no offense to anyone intended), but most women are looking for a strong man in their lives that can take care of them and handle life's problems as they come. You recognize that you are not, at present, that man for her. Your 180's are to change this pattern and show, through interaction with your children, that you can be a strong, loving and engaged father.
Do not underestimate the power of exercise! The endorphins released will improve your mood and outlook. When you start looking better you will feel more confident in yourself as well.
