I asked him why we couldn't reach an agreement first, then file. It will save us time and money. H said he doesn't want to wait any more. H just emailed me a link of website which explains the divorce process. He said we don't need lawyer. He assumes I will agree anything he wants?
Are you in the US? Since I'm going through this now I can give you an idea of what the steps are. I'm in TX, it may be a little different in your state (if you're in the US), but basically the initial step is for one of you to file a petition for D. The two of you don't have to agree on anything in the petition, only one party prepares and submits it. So when your H says he doesn't want to wait, he doesn't have to. He can file the petition and start the countdown on the 6 month wait whenever he wants.
Here in TX there's a 60 day "cooling off" period and it begins on the date the petition is filed with the court. When the petition is filed then you'll be served with a copy of it and then you have to prepare a response.
The "Final Decree of Divorce" is the document that contains all the details on how property is being divided up and what the visitation rights will be. THIS is the document that the two of you need to hammer out the details on. Typically one spouse (the one that wants the D) prepares it and presents it to the other spouse for review and comment. It's a good idea to consult a L if you think you're not getting fair treatment in it. Also if you have a very volatile R with your WAS, the L can act as your buffer so you don't have to deal with the spew. This document will have to be signed by both of you, so if the terms aren't agreed to it can drag things out for months and months (and the legal fees can really stack up too).
In my sitch things have gone very smoothly. W hired a lawyer just to assist with the preparation of the paperwork. Her L filed the petition and had me served, I prepared a response (my response basically said I did not object to the terms in the petition and I asked for a court date to be set). W prepared a decree through her L and we reviewed it together and made some minor changes. Her L is modifying it per our changes, then we will both sign it and take it to the court to present to the judge and we'll be D'd.
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BTW, many times when it was H's turn to pick up kids or watch them or took them to some classes, he just texted me that he was busy at work or something and asked me to do it for him. Of course I cannot say no. But I don't feel it right. Lawyers said since we haven't legally separated, I cannot enforce him to do what he promised. Is it true?
Well you can't enforce it legally, but that doesn't mean you can't put a boundary in place. You CAN say "no". It sounds to me like you're just letting him do whatever he wants, you don't have to just roll over on that kind of behavior. You could tell him that you're documenting all of his behavior to present in court and that if he doesn't man up you'll go for full custody for example.
