That is what DB reconciling looks like...because DB strives towards teaching a person to be interdependent. Maybe you save the marriage or not....either way the groundwork has been put in place.
What is heartbreaking for me that it has to take the threat of divorce for us to learn that there is another way. It isn't really our individual faults, more how we have learned to perceive (parents, tv, etc) how marriages are as opposed to how they could be. We grew up looking and learning from the codependency stand point....So we end up here and learn to change, maybe learn on our own, or else keeping jumping from relationship to relationship repeating the codependent cycle.
