I have really detached. I don't know if one ever completely detaches, but I no longer contact my W by phone or email. I don't drop by her desk at work, but only come to her when I have something work related for her. I have been doing a lot more more (GAL).
After my two week vacation, I really felt like I had emotionally stabilized. It wasn't long before I left for a week of work in Miami. It was a memorable experience. I made friends with a lot of people; I learned a lot of new things; I ate amazing food every night; and I really started to feel alive again. Back home, I still stop by the Irish pub on occasion, where everyone knows my name.
I no longer feel like I am on a roller coaster. I no longer worry about what my W is doing. I feel like that loving feeling has started to fade. My drinking has really tapered off. It is the occasional beer or social drinking, but not to excess.
I have started opening up more to friends about my situation and they have been supportive. Perhaps the biggest thing in all of this has been reconnecting with an old childhood friend around Thanksgiving. She has been a solid sounding board and my biggest supporter. She has been impressed with my devotion, efforts, and growth. Not long ago she confided she was also in the midst of marital strife with her H in a MLC. We have had many conversations about ourselves and relationships where we have been honest, blunt, and supportive. Somewhere along the way, without any intention, a fondness and affection have developed. While we are very far apart geographically, we have found that what we both have wanted and were missing in our relationships is very much the same. Our communications by email and text have increased where we are in touch several times a day and often text for hours each night. I don't know where it is leading, but I enjoy our conversations.
