Listen to what Sandi says...it is some of the top advice you will get on here. Make an appointment with a DB coach....
Reading your initial post...there is a lot of work that needs to be done.....By you. For right now I suggest:
1- Stop the drinking....nobody can help you if you are drunk.
2- Get the DB session set up (and read the books)
3- Stop calling/texting/emailing your wife.....Right now you are not in a place to do those things. Let's get you calmed down and in a better place.
4- Don't look for quick answers and solutions....nothing is quick here and when things start moving fast...Well let's say that is a bad thing.
Remember you are not alone...We have all gone through the same stuff you are. The world will not end because of it.
Today we start finding YOU lost....I know that doesn't make sense, but make a goal to have that statement make sense to you eventually. It will take awhile and not be easy, but make that commitment to yourself.
