separated 8 weeks still on the journey

[labug]

And she hasn't been that person you want her to be for a very long time, from what you write.

That's the hard part, letting go of what we want and accepting what we have, then asking ourselves 'is this enough?'

What LITB says is very true, you are still attached, but you're attached to something that is no longer, you want to change your W, you want the past back. Divorce won't heal any of that, that's our continuing work.

You can't really move forward until you accept where you are today. That begins with letting go, allowing her to have her life, creating personal boundaries for you. I had to have a very similar talk with my H before I was able to really let go. I didn't move to divorce at that time because my heart wasn't ready but my life improved drastically.

Are there any divorce recovery groups in your area or other groups you might attend. Real life guides and contacts are so helpful.

Take things slowly.