Blues, wow your H is a hot mess! My first thoughts when reading your post were same as labug's- he sounds depressed. And I don't mean just feeling a little down, but clinically depressed. Do you think he may be suicidal? I hear some of the warning signs in what you described, but you're the one that sees and talks to him so you'd know better. Obviously we're not doc's here and can't diagnose mental illness, but you might Google "warning signs your loved one may be suicidal" and read some of the material to get a better idea of what to watch for. Unfortunately he's not in a mode where he's interested in listening to you, so if you think intervention is required then you might seek the help of a counselor.
