Originally Posted By: D2ndday
I'll keep reading, and figuring out what how to get on top. Though about taking a trip, just to get out of "this", thought it might give me a break to come at it fresh. Get a break from all of this negativity, and come back refreshed. However I don't know how relaxed I would be. Think I might just be worried, like is she bringing him in my house, or will I come home and find my house empty. So not sure yet about that idea. We'll see. Ill just keep on keeping on for now.


Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone as I am in the exact same situation. Truth is, I KNOW she comes over when I'm not there. So, you going away, should be for you, so that YOU take a breather regardless of what your spouse is up to. You may come home and the house is empty. And what if? You'll deal with it if that does happen. One day at a time, one foot before the other.

I realized that I cannot control what my spouse does or thinks but I can control my body and mind. When I realized that, it was a weight off my shoulders! I stopped focusing on H and a light bulb went off.. What are YOU gonna do to make yourself "comfortable and safe" in your situation, regardless of your spouse. I now know what people here say that you need to set boundaries for yourself and not for THEM.

Keep strong!


Me: 36
H: 36
No kids
EA/PA confirmed: 02-Jan-2014
Separate bedrooms/still living together