Afraid I have waited too long

[nit84]

If I were to do something that I wanted to because I wanted to do it, without worrying what the W felt about it, that is ok, correct?

If I were to do this something and I know it will solicit a response most likely a negative one from the W should I still do it? After all it is what I want to do without worry of W feelings but is it hindering chances of R?

For instance, I want to start painting the house soon while it is still winter and I cant improve the exterior of the house right now.

I will "act if" that W will be receptive to the idea and my hope is she will.

Problem is she said back in Dec. we cant do any improvements until we see what L's say. I disagreed with this but did't start an argument because I was nowhere ready to do improvements. No movement toward L has happened as far as I know on her part.

Now that I am more prepared to start painting I would like to.

Recently W packed up some knick knaks and when the idea of putting a TV in that room came up she said it doesn't make any sense to do that now. We(she) are packing up to leave.

I don't know her plans because we don't discuss much so I couldn't even guess what they are.

By doing this work it is a 180 from before where I would just let it go and not do it(laziness).

I don't want to guess(mind read) but the W could be saying or thinking these things so that I don't do improvements thereby, justifying some of the reason she is a WAW.

When I brought up the subject last summer of starting to do these improvements I got "I have been asking for you to do this for years, now you are throwing it my face because we have to leave."

I told her back then "that isn't true, I know these things could have and should have been done sooner but you have to start somewhere and that is what I would like to do. This has nothing to do with our sitch it just needs done."

I don't blame her for thinking that I am only doing it for her but these things do need to be done.

How can I approach this in the least combative way?