Kickboxing is awesome. I don't know what I would do without my TKD training - it helps so much with aggression. Even just putting my boxing gloves on makes me instantly feel 10 times tougher and more confident. Maybe I should just start wearing them around everywhere I go . . . .
I found a class that fits my schedule with the kids. After I kick this cold, I am going to take the free class and see how it goes.
Originally Posted By: Lostforwords
3b....Just a thought on bed time calls. I would let the kids answer those. Make sure they keep it brief and if they hand the phone to you...just say "I am busy, say good bye to daddy and hang up". The one twist with this phone call is that it could be their dad calling to just say good night to them. So honestly, you don't want to appear to be the villian by not letting him talk to the kids, but you keep the boundary up of not talking to him....a win/win for you and the kids.
You are right LFW. I did not even think about that last night because H is not one that calls to say goodnight to the boys (not sure that he has yet). However, I should have just answered and handed the phone to one of the boys. I really do not want to withhold the boys from their dad at all or vise versa.
Originally Posted By: Lostforwords
As for today....When he asks why you didn't answer the phone last night (it will happen) your reply needs to be "I was busy"......nothing more. Let's work on making you stronger and that starts today. Do not fall for his questions....be stronger and let your actions mirror your values.
My H wound up calling and texting again last night because he was concerned that something was wrong. I just responded that I had been busy and was fine.
H called this morning to discuss logistics with the kids. This is where I always have a problem because he transitions from logistics into other subject matters. I try not to be rude and don't engage him in conversation and usually just try to bring the conversation back to logistics. I try and use the friendly neighbor technique. It was so much easier for me to ignore him when he was a jerk before and after BD. I think that I have been deprived of his attention for so long that it is hard to not get dragged back in now. But I know that I need to be stronger. He needs to earn the honor of being my friend. He is getting something from our current R and I am not getting very much at all.
Originally Posted By: labug
Did you ever get to an AlAnon meeting?
I have not had a chance to get to an AlAnon meeting yet. I looked over the website and there are so many local meetings that I was just overwhelmed. I will look into it again because I think that it would be helpful to my situation.
