own a buz 20: confused within the confusion

[makingmagic]

Hi GM... having a tough time understanding what you wrote. I will try to grasp it as best I can. I think what you mean is about me saving the comment for later... I meant a whole other time/place if R was ever on the table. Being honest about the discoveries I have made and learned. Is this what you mean GM?

One of the things I am struggling with is similar to my friend on another thread:

"he is afraid that we will fall into old habits and go back to our old ways of reacting to each other. I don't know what to say to these things. If he asks me what I think, I just say 'I don't know what to say - you know how I feel about that'. But that's a trap too because then she asks me how I feel and I fall, reinforcing that I am still there for him to come back to."..... any thoughts on this?


I forgot to add above, I was also shovelling snow on to him several times without my knowledge. He said "hey, do you mind? you are throwing snow in my boots"... I looked up and laughed. I think today, I was able to show that inspite of the yucky stuff we are dealing with, that I can be "happy" inspite of his confusion. That I am taking charge of my atmosphere. Also, there was a bit of "touch" today too. He was laying underneath a vehicle, and I wanted to see what was going on under there, so I touched his shoulder so that I could see along side of him. I then later got on my back and under the vehicle too, when I was trying to get back up, he put his hand out to help me up.... nice!

But, then again... he is a nice guy.