Settling in for the long road ahead

[Liberty3]

Just spent a couple of days with H. He was working and I went along for the ride. On the first day he asked if I wanted to 'speak about anything', meaning our R and I replied that there wasn't. He was a bit quiet after that and later I wondered if it was his way of trying to open up a conversation about things.

I asked him about it the following day, but he said he thought I might want to talk about something before we stopped for the night. No idea what he meant by that, but we did go on to talk.

He says he hasn't been happy for 15 years, he recounted a talk we had where he said he wasn't going to ever initiate s3x again, that I have been pushing him away, the kids are now grown, and he's had enough. There has been no conversation between us apart from business for years and I just ignored him when he came home.

I validated his concerns, I did put over my point of view on a few things, especially the s3x concern. He has definitely been initiating! I asked him about what was OK to talk about too. I said that it was difficult to find a topic of conversation, current events cause him to get angry and frustrated, he doesn't think we have a future as a couple, if I talk about my plans he says he feels left out and we are leading seperate lives, sometimes it seems talking business is the only safe thing! He did say that he did like to be included in some future plans.

Great! A safe topic to talk about, we had been tossing around a camping trip with friends in a couple of years. Later that afternoon I brought up the subject, asking what sort of vehicle did H think would be suitable for the trip. I then get the spiel about how he doesn't know if he is going to buy a vehicle, who said he is going on the trip, doesn't know if he will want to be with me...............!! WTF!!!!!

Any ideas on what to talk about??????

He keeps saying he is sitting on the fence, he doesn't know if he wants to be with me or not. He can see that I have done a lot of work on myself in the past year and he has done nothing but he doesn't know what he wants to do. He says he doesn't want to touch me or give my any reason to think that we might have a future together, yet he is willing to receive cuddles, back rubs and s3x.

Confused! Yep, my new middle name.