Dingo, you're welcome to disagree with me anytime you want. But I definitely disagree that setting a boundary that protects you is fear-based. Boundaries are necessary for a strong, healthy R. Living fear-based is not setting a boundary for fear of making the other person unhappy.
If you feel good about the email you sent, then feel good about it. But I think something must be niggling you or you wouldn't be disagreeing so strongly. I'm always the most defensive when I'm trying to convince myself that I'm right.
We have only what you've written about your W to go on. I think she's confused and maybe a bit scared but the mindset of the WAS very rarely has anything to do with what I post to people.
I just read back through your threads and she hasn't been consistent for more than a couple of days since you've been on the boards. If I've misread, please let me know.
What do you need to see/hear from her to feel confident in re-engaging?
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
