WADad's tale of Woe

[Wadad]

So its been a busy week on the home front. My wife is still thinking about trying to make it work, which is better than deciding not to to.

I ended up going to the ER the other day, (less than a week after a perfect physical) but it appears to just be kidney stones from dehydration. My wife wanted to go with me to the hospital, and was worried about me, and even used a term of endearment but I suspect that it just slipped out. I had her stay home, but was disappointed that she didn't cal or txt, though later she said she was waiting to hear from me and didn't want to bother me.

Then last Friday she had a hellish day at work, her boss called her to say she'd had a few complaints and then the kicker was that her boss said she'd gotten an email intimating that my wife and another employee were having an affair. It was seriously crazy, to have to listen to this, she was really upset about it, and I tried to validate and support but in my mind of course I really wondered... On the other hand why would she have told me if it were true... On the third hand... I can rationalize it either way.

Things have calmed down some now though, and my resolutions are going very well, I'm keeping a tight control on my temper and even trying to work on it not getting triggered and on using more positive language and having a PMA more of the time. I'm also down 40 lbs, still walking most days, working on running, and my classes are going very well.

[Wadad]

So my wife and I talked on Saturday, and we're going to divorce. We're hoping to go through a mediator since we both mostly know what we want and agree on it. She seems in a hurry, to get closure I guess. I feel sad and I would still like to fix things, but why would I want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me. Honestly at this point I feel like I'm a WAS too, at least sometimes.

Anyway, I wish everyone who has taken the time to read this well with their own situations.

Wadad

[MrBond]

That was quick. Did you try implementing any of the DB principles? You do know that it takes awhile for this stuff to take hold. All of our spouses were "set" to D just like your W.