Sandi can answer for Sandi but just know that boundaries are important and that you get to decide who you let in but do it knowing the consequences.

If your W really loves you and wants to be with you, you protecting your boundaries won't kill her love. You could even remind her that you have a very good reason to want to protect yourself.

If your W constantly ignores your boundaries, you have a decision to make. Is this someone you want a R with?

Don't mind-read about what's going on in her head about D, the other man, etc. That's fear-based and living in fear keeps you stuck.

Do what's best for Dingo.

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss