Paul - I think that it is way too early. Your W has come an inch closer and you want to push her a mile. I love the squirrel analogy that you see posted out a lot. Your squirrel took one step toward the nut and you are ready to pounce. You are going to scare her away.
You both need time and space to work on yourselves. I think that the goal point of your conversation should be to set boundaries for all involved. But leave your M out of it for now.
