I went to court this morning, signed the final judgement and received approval by the judge. I am officially divorced.
It was just my L and I. I have not contacted my W and really don't think she cares. The whole event was very anti-climatic. I am not sure if I should even mention it to the kids.
I don't even know how I feel.
There is a definite feeling of closure. I am done wasting money on lawyers. The petty battles over property are finished. But mostly, the anxiety and indecision about the compromises I had to make to get an agreement are gone. It doesn't matter anymore, the agreement is final.
At the same time, I have this tremendous feeling of loss. I know my marriage was over long ago, but there is something tangible about hearing a judge proclaim it. The house I bought and lived in for 12 years is no longer mine. I am legally single. It is very sad.
I mentioned that my divorce was final to a couple of coworkers and they congratulated me. I guess they are right, but "congratulations" sure doesn't feel right.
