Thoughts on cake-eating and the Beyond LRT?

[dxw689]

Calling for quick help from the boards: Who has experience with the Beyond Last Resort technique? and I welcome your thoughts on cake-eating in general and when and how it time to put a stop to it.

I am ready to approach the walk-away spouse and tell him: I set you free - if you want a divorce, you have it. It has only been just short of 4 months since bomb drop, but in that short time, he moved out, slept with other woman together with my kids in his apartment "because he wanted them to meet her", and now OW has moved in with him. He likes to hint at how much fun they are all having to me and avoids all serious alone discussions, so that I never know these things are occurring until after they've happened. Now he is about to be laid off and other woman already was. I've seen a lawyer, who thinks I should file for divorce immediately. I have been calm in all post-BD discussions - well, some tears, but no screaming. But he is running extremely fast and it is like he wants me desperately to hear that he wants out with no going back. After much discussion with friends and soul-searching, I think I am about ready to be willing to give that - to say, if you want me, I love you, I am here. But if you don't want to be with me, you go do what you need to do. I am willing to set you free.

Experiences or advice from the vets and the boards?