maybe a bit off the edge?

[dingo]

It would be very unusual for me not to respond.

In fact, if i don't respond to this, it would be the second time within a week that I did not respond - I never responded to her question about the D and the A. She even invited me to call her at lunch or text her and I did neither. Both completely out of character for me as before I would have taken any chance to call her and talk with her.

So far, it has not been all that difficult to not contact her. Not because I don't want to speak with her but as CL said, as a way to further my goal. I see NC as a way to get out from under her shadow and possibly as a way to get her to end the affair (if she hasn't already) and consider reconciling.

And I will be honest with myself and with you all - the possibility of reconciling is still the primary reason. But I recognize this and am working on it...